Why I refuse to share another’s story

ID-10080761Too often the rumor mill gets going and stories are flung about. Sometimes, the person who owns the story is the one sharing but often there is quite a bit of sharing that comes from the wrong place.

I work hard at removing myself from such blabbing but of course, I’ve had my weak moments. Each time, it made me feel down right yucky. What I was saying had nothing to do with me, and I had no place speaking out about someone else’s situation. That crappy feeling was so intense – I have reverted to only sharing my viewpoint, my experience, and my story. (There’s a big difference between sharing your experience and spreading gossip.)

While that’s reason enough, there are other reasons I don’t share another’s story. First of all…

It’s none of my business.

If it doesn’t directly affect me, concern me, or even pertain to me – it’s none of my business. Even someone’s opinion of me, isn’t my business. That’s all on them and what they need to figure out. I’ve got my own self-work going on without worrying about what someone thinks of me.

I may leak information that isn’t meant to be told.

I tend to be honest – to a fault. If I’m asked a question, I’ll answer it. If there is a surprise birthday party is planned for you… you can usually tell if I avoid you like the plague. I’m not good at lying or giving false information. If it seems like I’m keeping my sentences short and dodging you, chances are there’s something I’m trying not to tell you.

Golden Rule: Treat those as you would like to be treated.

Respecting the privacy of others is important, just like I would hope they would respect mine. How can I trust someone if they are involved in sharing information behind someone else’s back? Wouldn’t they turn around and do the same to me? People who go out of their way to stir the pot just creates unnecessary drama.

It can change someone’s impression.

If I go on and on about someone else’s situation, it could actually change their impression of me. They might be engaged in whatever I’m talking about and most likely contributing to the conversation, but what’s to stop them from thinking poorly about me because I spend so much time focused on someone else’s business?

I could be interfering with their journey.

This is a huge one. Awhile back I was witness to a situation, someone was having an issue with their kids and the school. Rather than handling it by talking to the parent directly, the news went through the vine. In the end, the parent missed the lesson in the situation because they were too busy being (rightfully) mad about being talked about – instead of objectively looking at their contribution and responsibility in the scenario.

I have been guilty of running my mouth and each time I felt crummy. I’m far from perfect. Truthfully, perfection isn’t the goal. Feeling like a complete, kind and true-to-myself person is the goal.  And I’m working on it. One little bit at a time.

 

 

Photo courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

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